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| //"niger"// | <imgcaption image1|frenserb 3 Scuti>{{:scooty.png?170 |}}</imgcaption> Scuti is a gamer who joined /pol/andcraft in September 2015. Since December 2018, autists of the /pol/andcraft Discord server has been subjugated under his dominion. This reign of terror, which continues to this day, has been characterized by not banning anyone, shitposting, but mostly doing fucking nothing. |
| —Scuti | |
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| dab | |
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| Scuti is a player who joined /pol/andcraft in September 2015. He has been the owner of the /pol/andcraft Discord server since December 2018, and his reign of terror continues to this day in 2020. He is also a Christchad, which means that he realizes Jesus is the ultimate final gigachad who will dab on Jews by deleting them into the eternal oven | Scuti is currently in the process of fucking your mom, which is a Herculean task due to her planetary size, but luckily his dick is, itself, a gargantuan Eldritch abomination which can effortlessly pierce through even stars, so it is of no more difficulty to him than ascending to higher planes |
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| ===== Before /pol/andcraft ===== | this article is under construction as of right now |
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| | shut the fuck up |
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| | ======= History ======= |
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| Scuti started playing Minecuck in early 2012 and gave into the premium account Jew in 2013, when the redpill process had began with the epic meme HITLER DID NOTHING WRONG 2013, and culminated in mid-2015 when he realized the Holocaust did not fucking happen. | ===== Before /pol/andcraft ===== |
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| | Scuti started playing Minebrap (cracked version) in early 2012. During this time he was a regular on a 100-player PvP factions survival server where, at one point, he got mod and then committed extremely based and funny crymes where he teleported his brother to random faggots' bases so he could kill them and take their shit. He also kicked and banned Mexicans for being Mexican (he deemed that Latin Americans are Mexican so they may have not literally been Mexican, but them being Mexican was funnier than being technically correct so it became truth), which was an omen for things to come. Eventually Scuti paid money to Mojang in 2013 to get a premium account. It was around this time that he became an irredeemable shitposter who said HITLER DID NOTHING WRONG 2013. Later this shitpost became unironic in mid-2015 when he was radicalized by the severe autism pit by the name of 8chan. |
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| ===== True Hero of /pol/andcraft ===== | ===== True Hero of /pol/andcraft ===== |
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| **Miloserb: Sept. 2015–Mar. 2016** | ==== Miloserb: Sept. 2015–Mar. 2016 ==== |
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| Scuti's first two days on /pol/andcraft consisted of him shitposting in chat while making his base which was near spawn. Because of this shitposting, and probably also the fact his faction was named "wew" instead of something autistic, NSDAP's resident dyke Emeldavi got pissed at him and then sent fetuscake to dab on him. fetuscake almost had TNT'd his way into Scuti's underground base when the latter GTFO with epic /home powers. SPQR would soon join NSDAP in chasing the newfag across the map literally like five fucking times. Scuti managed to survive and never lose his shit even though he sucked at the game and his enemies were professional autists. He also was a part of RAS (later ASSR) for a while until they got dabbed on by SPQR. After this he made a cozy underground base that he has copied multiple times. | <imgcaption image2|babby first base (2015, Miloserb, near Spawn at Congo)>{{babby_first.png?350 |}}</imgcaption> <imgcaption image4|the base that Scuti replicates over and over again (this itself is a replica)>{{copy_shit.png?350|}}</imgcaption> |
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| **Owenserb: Mar. 2016–Apr. 2016** | Scuti's first two days on /pol/andcraft consisted of him shitposting in chat while making his base, not far from spawn. Because of this shitposting, and probably also the fact his faction was named "wew" instead of something autistic, NSDAP's resident dyke Emeldavi got pissed at him and then sent fetuscake to dab on him. Provoking the anger of NSDAP spergs by saying /me ass and Baneposting was Scuti's crossing of the Rubicon. This war would last as long as the server ran. Scuti's underground jungle base, very close to spawn (in the Congo, also Miloserb was an earth map), was easy to find. fetuscake almost had TNT'd his way into Scuti's base when the latter GTFO with epic /home powers. SPQR would soon join NSDAP in chasing the newfag across the map literally like four fucking times. Scuti moved his base to Spain, then some shit happened to cause him to move to Japan (he was probably found). He proceeded to rename his faction from "wew" to "CIA," and then his Japan base was destroyed (sans valuables) via cobblemonster by SPQR after they snuck a Baneposting mole into his faction to track him down. The prolonged chase sequence was not over yet, however. The next base Scuti created was located in the ocean west of Chile, and it was a wood rectangle floating just below the surface of the ocean. This box was ugly as balls but decently secure. Scuti fucked off again when a NSDAP (or SPQR) autist appeared on his minimap. Scuti managed to survive and never lose his valuables even though he sucked at the game and his enemies were professional autists hailing from literally the strongest factions on the server at that time. |
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| | <imgcaption image3|communism in minecraft>{{ :assr.png?350|}}</imgcaption> Scuti then became a part of NAS, later known as RAS and lastly ASSR, which was a syndicalist faction led by legopikachu and gommie_69 which Scuti joined even though he was a /pol/ Nazi. Firstly, NAS's base at bedrock (which was in Ireland) got fucked up by the raiding faction Avars. A while later, NAS got involved in a conflict with SPQR which revolved around Athens. In an unrelated instance, Scuti broke into a replica of the Parthenon and used his sword to fucking eviscerate Akramer89, who was in the base without any armor. Anyway the Greece conflict was manufactured by SPQR, who wanted a casus belli so they could assrape ASSR, with the pedophile Magnon32 possibly being behind all of that bullshit. Following this, Scuti left the faction and created the second "wew," which had a base near the Southwest that was cozy as fuck, and he would recreate this base over and over. Also around this time, Scuti met bioman3, who was a harmless retard at the time, and the former trolled the latter epicly as they created the icy shithole Fagarctica. Soon, AZ99 and SnoopCatt420 joined wew, whose last base was an upside-down pyramid floating above the ocean somewhere. Miloserb then shut down in March 2016. |
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| | ==== Owenserb: Mar. 2016–Apr. 2016 ==== |
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| Owenserb was a fucking mistake | Owenserb was a fucking mistake |
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| **cuccserb: Jul. 2017–Apr. 2018** | ==== cuccserb: Jul. 2017–Apr. 2018 ==== |
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| During his first few weeks on the server, Scuti was a part of AZ9's faction OASIS, in whose base he made a fucking elevator and it was epic. Also he constantly complained about how it costed way too fucking many emeralds to claim an enemy faction's land for it to be even worth it to raid anyone. In January 2018 he resumed playing video game and joined bioman3's faction Bavaria, which fucking imploded the next month. On February 2, Scuti epic trolled spawn by exploiting the retarded tree plugin, making trees grow into Safezone. This meme was dubbed the "great tree fucking of spawn" by Scuti and nobody else. Bavaria became Prussia, which later became Germania, basing on top of a large island. This faction was subject to permanent, rampant infighting. Then the Vape War happened. | During his first few weeks on the server, Scuti was a part of AZ9's faction OASIS, in whose base he made a fucking elevator and it was epic. Also he constantly complained about how it costed way too fucking many emeralds to claim an enemy faction's land for it to be even worth it to raid anyone. In January 2018 he resumed playing video game and joined bioman3's faction Bavaria, which fucking imploded the next month. On February 2, Scuti epic trolled spawn by exploiting the retarded tree plugin, making trees grow into Safezone. This meme was dubbed the "great tree fucking of spawn" by Scuti and nobody else. Bavaria became Prussia, which later became Germania, basing on top of a large island. This faction was subject to permanent, rampant infighting. Then the Vape War happened. |
| The intcuck faggots Lemon and XDA1 (and their horde of alts) appeared in the middle of March under the name VapeNation. A raid against them lead by the inept retard epicfaillord completely fucking failed when the raiders came to the realization that nobody had brought TNT, so they proceeded to dance on the Vapecuck base's roof in order to intimidate them. That night, some of the raiders used a Wither to dab on Vape's base while those faggots were offline. This was supposed to set a precedent but fucking nothing happened. The autistic alliance CHAD chased VapeNation across the map like three times and eventually the final battle took place at lordofthegoy's residence. The harmless buildfag was being harassed by the autistic faggots Lemon and XDA1, and the forces of CHAD appeared with its goal being to protect the innocent and delete the Vapecucks. The battle was at a stalemate (leaning Vape) when cuccubus dabbed on VapeNation by deleting their alts, allowing Scuti and the other CHAD autists to claim Vape's land and deport them. Scuti quickly GTFO to Vape's base to claim that shit immediately, and he succeeded, but since the war was over and the enemy was gone, the playercount quickly dropped off. Scuti soon retired to Kyushu with Kony2016, and on April 20, the server entered the recycle bin. | The intcuck faggots Lemon and XDA1 (and their horde of alts) appeared in the middle of March under the name VapeNation. A raid against them lead by the inept retard epicfaillord completely fucking failed when the raiders came to the realization that nobody had brought TNT, so they proceeded to dance on the Vapecuck base's roof in order to intimidate them. That night, some of the raiders used a Wither to dab on Vape's base while those faggots were offline. This was supposed to set a precedent but fucking nothing happened. The autistic alliance CHAD chased VapeNation across the map like three times and eventually the final battle took place at lordofthegoy's residence. The harmless buildfag was being harassed by the autistic faggots Lemon and XDA1, and the forces of CHAD appeared with its goal being to protect the innocent and delete the Vapecucks. The battle was at a stalemate (leaning Vape) when cuccubus dabbed on VapeNation by deleting their alts, allowing Scuti and the other CHAD autists to claim Vape's land and deport them. Scuti quickly GTFO to Vape's base to claim that shit immediately, and he succeeded, but since the war was over and the enemy was gone, the playercount quickly dropped off. Scuti soon retired to Kyushu with Kony2016, and on April 20, the server entered the recycle bin. |
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| **Cptserb: Apr. 2018–Jul. 2018** | ==== Cptserb: Apr. 2018–Jul. 2018 ==== |
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| After cuccserb closed, CptPlanet_ made a new server and it was shit. Scuti did not actually play until two weeks into the serb's existence, missing Vape War II, in which CHAD autists (in a failed faction called USGA) and SPQR chased XDA1, who escaped and ultimately fucking nothing happened. Cpt was a retard who did not fucking listen to the playerbase at all and he never added any of the plugins that users constantly requested. In June, the serb was dying, and the legend of the spawn cobblemonsters began. Lobber cobbled spawn, and then Cpt removed it. Then Scuti cobbled spawn and the same thing happened, and Scuti cobbled spawn again and the epic was removed again. The next month, in an actually based move, Cpt deleted factions for the last week of the serb, prompting mass raiding of every single base on the server. After this shitstorm, Cpt gave every player creative mode, and soon the community would render the server literally fucking unplayable before it was gassed on July 31. Scuti also fucking eraseed the entirety of Hawaii, which was epic and based. | After cuccserb closed, CptPlanet_ made a new server and it was shit. Scuti did not actually play until two weeks into the serb's existence, missing Vape War II, in which CHAD autists (in a failed faction called USGA) and SPQR chased XDA1, who escaped and ultimately fucking nothing happened. Cpt was a retard who did not fucking listen to the playerbase at all and he never added any of the plugins that users constantly requested. In June, the serb was dying, and the legend of the spawn cobblemonsters began. Lobber cobbled spawn, and then Cpt removed it. Then Scuti cobbled spawn and the same thing happened, and Scuti cobbled spawn again and the epic was removed again. The next month, in an actually based move, Cpt deleted factions for the last week of the serb, prompting mass raiding of every single base on the server. After this shitstorm, Cpt gave every player creative mode, and soon the community would render the server literally fucking unplayable before it was gassed on July 31. Scuti also fucking eraseed the entirety of Hawaii, which was epic and based. |
| This iteration of Hudserb was a bug-infested piece of shit that gradually stopped being shit mechanics-wise, but in turn it became more and more inactive and eventually fucking died. Scuti logged on in late September after being harassed by bioman3, whose faction he joined. Baden was a shitstorm full of conflict and civil war, and it met its demise when Scuti gave the coords to the huge fucking autist Lakiga. This all happened within the span of 30 minutes. The bullinamarket saga soon began, and Scuti and frens were chased by this faggot autist constantly, requiring them to change bases (and the faction's name) repeatedly. Eventually this faggot's base was gassed by someone (NSDAP?) and he stopped playing. Regardless, the faction Scuti was in was moved into the sky and renamed Columbia. Probably because the faction plugin's config settings were fucked, Lakiga was immortal. Unable to take any damage, Lakiga proceeded to Holocaust the members of Columbia. Scuti proceeded to GTFO bioman3's faction and instead joined Lobber's faction America. 3 days after Lakiga's gassing of Columbia, Scuti abused the fucked faction perms which allowed allies to break shit in faction land but not place blocks. He broke into Lakiga's base and fucking cleaned it out, deleting all of the chests and heads on the wall. Soon afterwards, Scuti was absent from the serb for a month. | This iteration of Hudserb was a bug-infested piece of shit that gradually stopped being shit mechanics-wise, but in turn it became more and more inactive and eventually fucking died. Scuti logged on in late September after being harassed by bioman3, whose faction he joined. Baden was a shitstorm full of conflict and civil war, and it met its demise when Scuti gave the coords to the huge fucking autist Lakiga. This all happened within the span of 30 minutes. The bullinamarket saga soon began, and Scuti and frens were chased by this faggot autist constantly, requiring them to change bases (and the faction's name) repeatedly. Eventually this faggot's base was gassed by someone (NSDAP?) and he stopped playing. Regardless, the faction Scuti was in was moved into the sky and renamed Columbia. Probably because the faction plugin's config settings were fucked, Lakiga was immortal. Unable to take any damage, Lakiga proceeded to Holocaust the members of Columbia. Scuti proceeded to GTFO bioman3's faction and instead joined Lobber's faction America. 3 days after Lakiga's gassing of Columbia, Scuti abused the fucked faction perms which allowed allies to break shit in faction land but not place blocks. He broke into Lakiga's base and fucking cleaned it out, deleting all of the chests and heads on the wall. Soon afterwards, Scuti was absent from the serb for a month. |
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| | ===== OLD, FUCKED UP VERSION OF THE ARTICLE ===== |
| | “dab” |
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| | ?Scuti |
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| | Scuti is a player on Polandcraft and has played on most iterations of the server since late 2015. He is the second and current owner of the /pol/andcraft Discord server, and the third owner of the /polandcraft/ board on 8chan. |
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| | History |
| | Miloxydian's Server - “Miloserb” |
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| | Scuti joined the server in September 2015, at which time Miloxydian was admin. The server had been running since August, with Hudson also as admin, but Milo at the forefront. The server used a mountainous earth map with warps all around it, and the two factions NSDAP and SPQR dominated the server. Scuti's first faction was called “wew” and was located in a jungle right next to spawn (possibly in the Congo). He provoked the anger of the large faction NSDAP by shitposting in chat (saying /me ass and also Baneposting). Player fetuscake approached Scuti's underground base and began digging down in order to set up a TNT cannon, the former wearing fully enchanted diamond armor and the latter in shitty iron armor. fetuscake had almost blown a hole in Scuti's wall when the latter finished packing his valuables up and teleported the fuck away. This event marked the beginning of a chase which would go on for the rest of Milo's server. After the fetuscake incident, Scuti moved to Spain and carved out the side of a small mountain. He also created a bridge across the Strait of Gibraltar, which was epic for the win. Scuti soon abandoned this base (possibly because it was discovered) and moved to Japan. Around this time, his faction was renamed from “wew” to “CIA.” The Japan base did not last long either, meeting its demise within two days of its existence. An enemy (either SPQR or NSDAP) posted as a newfag and joined Scuti's faction. This allowed SPQR and NSDAP to easily track him down. Scuti's Japanese base was underground and was under a lake. The enemy coalition cobblemonstered the lake, turning it to stone and thus rendering it vulnerable, and then blew up the roof of the base with TNT. By the time they broke in, Scuti had already fucked off with his valuables. A few months later, he erected a memorial to this base at its ruins. The prolonged chase sequence was not over yet, however. The next base Scuti created was located in the ocean southwest of Japan. He learned from the cobblemonster incident that he needed more than just one layer of water protecting him, so his next base was a jungle wood rectangle floating below the surface but above the bottom of the ocean. This box was ugly as balls but decently secure. Scuti began the moving process once again when he saw an enemy from the NSDAP/SPQR coalition on his minimap. |
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| | A replica of the cozy Southwest wew base |
| | Some time later, Scuti was invited by legopikachu to join NAS, which was some syndicalist faction. Their base, which was a wide area at bedrock, got dabbed on by the raiding faction Avars. NAS was renamed to RAS and moved to an obsidian autism box in the Nether. Notable members of this faction were AZ99, gommie_69, and Steven_Pinker. The faction was then renamed to ASSR. Shortly afterwards, ASSR got dabbed on hard by SPQR, which unleashed a Wither (able to break obsidian) and assraped the ASSR base. After this debacle, ASSR moved to a Nether fortress and then got fucked by the NSDAP/SPQR coalition, particularly Magnon32. A while later, the faction Scuti was in (may not have been ASSR anymore) got involved in a conflict with SPQR around a town in Greece. Around this time, Scuti broke into a Greek base (a replica of the Parthenon) and proceeded to dab on Akramer89, who was in the base without any armor. However, SPQR once again declared war and pissed all over this faction. Following this, Scuti left the faction and created his own one-man faction, which reused the name “wew.” This faction's base, located southwest of the American Southwest, was cozy as fuck, so he recreated this same base multiple times on different servers. Also around this time, Scuti met bioman3, who was a harmless retard at the time, and the former trolled the latter epicly as they created the icy shithole Fagarctica. There was one more base following this, in which wew ceased to be a one-man faction because AZ99 and SnoopCatt420 joined. This last base was an upside-down pyramid floating above the ocean somewhere. Miloxydian's server tragically shut down in early March 2016. |
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| | Owenstine's Server - “Owenserb” |
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| | Owen was a huge fucking faggot who opened a server near the end of March 2016. His server had the Gods plugin which was based although it had no practical function in gameplay, only serving a purpose for epic lmaos and religious (war) roleplay. Scuti was in AZ99's faction, OASIS, which worshiped AdrenalineON as their god. Unrelated to this, Owen held a few contests where ridiculously overpowered gear and weapons were given out. From these contests, Scuti obtained Protection V boots and a Sharpness VI sword. Now that he had this OP shit, he got bored and stopped playing on the server because there was no more point. The server went on after this, but Scuti was not there to witness the shitstorms that followed, as he had quit after playing for less than a week. |
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| | cuccubus's Server - “cuccserb” |
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| | In July 2017, Scuti joined cuccubus's server after a long hiatus. Scuti immediately joined OASIS, which had an obsidian box base at bedrock. This server had the silk spawners plugin, so OASIS also had a blaze spawner. The faction was fairly advanced but had inactive players. This fact coupled with the existence of a currency system, which required that one pay money (that required grinding to obtain) to conquer another faction's land, resulted in another hiatus, this time for three months. At some point, the amount of money required to take over people's shit was reduced significantly. In January 2018, Scuti returned and joined bioman3's faction Bavaria, which was a small town with walls surrounding it. This faction previously had that fucking faggot Owen and BigBuilderMcGee in it but were no longer present when Scuti joined. Instead, the literal fucking autist Pokeball99 was there. While in Bavaria, Scuti placed trees in spawn plots, planting them on top of each other, which made them grow to be taller than a nearby skyscraper. These trees were impossible to remove except by admin intervention, which is how they were deleted. Scuti and Pokeball99 did some shit, resulted in bioman3 getting assmad and becoming increasingly strict, exemplified by his famous words, “you can build anything beyond this lapis line.” The area beyond the blue line was deep underground and was generally shit tier, so Scuti never made anything there. Later, Scuti and Pokeball99 dabbed on bioman3, Scuti taking half of the faction's shit so bioman3 wouldn't notice. Scuti reestablished wew, creating a replica of the cozy base from Milo's server. He soon rejoined bioman3's new faction, Prussia, but kept the same base he had from wew. |
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| | Palace at Germania, decorated for breast cancer awareness |
| | Prussia (later Germania) was a pretty comfy small village on a big island, situated between a long craggy hill and a mountain, forming a sort of valley. The members besides Scuti and bioman3 were BigBuilderMcGee and Kony2016. Once the faction grew to six members, adding minor autists MenelausMontrose and John_Price, the faction was renamed to Germania. And there were also two (or three) Estonian nine-year-olds. Multiple events occurred during this time; among these are the construction of a tower, a house, a palace shaped like a box, the consecration of the Church of Kramer, the leveling of the craggy hill, the construction of a bridge to another island with a small fort, but most notably, Kony2016's construction of a Notre Dame replica north of spawn. In Germania, there was a large amount of infighting, mostly between BigBuilderMcGee, bioman3, and Scuti. In one incident out of many, BigBuilderMcGee's parrot which had been with him since the beginning of the server was slain by Scuti, causing BigBuilderMcGee to flip the fuck out and level Scuti's tower. This shitstorm epitomized how Germania was truly a dumpster fire. During the time of Germania, two autistic faggots, Lemon_ and XDA1, created the faction VapeNation, which would go on to harass peaceful players such as thunderfunked and lordofthegoy. The coalition known as CHAD chased VapeNation all around the map, forcing the latter to move bases repeatedly. This culminated in VapeNation's attempt to dab on lordofthegoy at his base and cuccubus's deletion of the alt accounts from the Vape faction. This caused most of VapeNation's land to be claimable, so Scuti went to the Vape base and took all of their good shit. Later, Scuti and Kony2016 left Germania to create Kyushu, which was a cozy Japanese village. The expansion of the village was cut short by the shutdown of the server by cuccubus in April 2018. |
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| | CptPlanet_'s Server “Cptserb” |
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| | Left: CptPlanet_'s spawn pyramid engulfed by a cobblemonster; Right: Attempted cobble |
| | In early May 2018, Scuti joined the steaming pile of shit that was CptPlanet_'s server. The faction he joined was called USA (changed to USGA), its members being those of CHAD (notably Lobber, Oveja, and bioman3). Around this time, the second war against VapeNation occurred, in which the USGA autists (except Scuti) and SPQR autists chased the ponyfucker XDA1 up the east coast of the United States. It was funny and epic but Scuti wasn't there so it doesn't matter. Back on track, the plan for USGA was to have weekly elections to select the faction leader. Lobber (renamed to xLOBBERx) won the first election and then BigBuilderMcGee won the following, but Lobber refused to relinquish power and thus rendered USGA a dictatorship before renaming it to Chadlands. bioman3 left the faction to start Cascadia, which consisted of a shitty house, which Scuti proceeded to cobble. Scuti based with Lobber in Panama but hardly played the game at all because of the lack of good plugins which were on cuccubus's server, and it did not help that the map was also shit. In late June, Lobber encompassed the spawn area (a pyramid) in a cobblemonster. Cpt removed it, which was followed by Scuti cobbling spawn. After Cpt removed this, Scuti once again cobbled spawn. In late July, Cpt realized the server was dead and decided to remove factions at the suggestion of the community. This resulted in the server-wide sacking of every single base, during which Scuti and cuccubus stored an absurd amount of supplies in a collection of shulker boxes in the Nether. Every single base, without exception, got dabbed on. Following the mass pillaging, Cpt gave every player creative mode. Within days, the server was rendered unplayable (more than it had been). Spawn was unrecognizable, and Scuti also blew up the entirety of Hawaii. CptPlanet_ shut the server down on the last day of July. |
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| | Hudson's Server “Hudserb” – Before Citadel |
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| | Columbia during construction |
| | In late September 2018, Hudson created a server and Scuti joined. The faction Scuti joined was bioman3's faction Baden, which also had Kony2016. Baden was a shitstorm full of conflict and civil war, and it met its demise when Scuti gave the coords to the huge fucking autist Lakiga. This all happened within the span of 30 minutes. The faction members moved to an island while fighting over what the new faction name should be, before deciding on Hawaii. In Hawaii, things were more peaceful. BigBuilderMcGee was invited to the faction and he joined, but Scuti kicked him and killed him for the epic. Hawaii got dabbed on when player HighTest (bullinamarket) used creeper eggs to blow up the majority of the base's chests. This was possible because offline raiding was allowed on the server. This setting was changed by Hudson once the number of complaints about it reached critical mass. bioman3 and Scuti moved to create Rapture, which consisted of an underwater hut and an underwater building which was perpetually under construction. Kony2012 became inactive around this time, and bioman3 and Scuti engaged in numerous civil wars. The end of Rapture came when bullinamarket appeared and attacked Scuti while bioman3 was offline. bullinamarket was able to get through the door because of a bug in the factions plugin which allowed enemies to open a faction's doors. The factions plugin used by Hudson was shit in general, though this would be fixed later. The next faction bioman3 and Scuti created was Columbia, which became a well-developed base in the sky, consisting of buildings connected by bridges. Kony2012 returned and a new player called Seagallows joined the faction. Columbia was prosperous aside from the occasional hit-and-run attacks by Lakiga. Eventually, because of a glitch, Lakiga became immortal. Unable to take damage, he took advantage of this fact, and he set his sights on Columbia. Lakiga proceeded to Holocaust the members of Columbia, and then NSDAP member YouKnowMe showed up to protect them, but to no avail. |
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| | Following this altercation, Scuti joined Lobber's faction America, which was actually productive unlike any of bioman3's factions. There was no infighting in this faction, only the perpetual construction and improvement of the obsidian autism box. JumboG of NSDAP broke into the base and set his home teleport there, resulting in Lobber blocking off where JumboG's /home had been set, and also America and NSDAP's relationship grew to be passive-aggressive. Scuti quit the server for a month and then returned to discover that on the west side of spawn, the player city (faction name “city,” but changed repeatedly), which was established by Golpher and harbored numerous other autists, had grown to become a fucking eyesore. Members of the city faction and their allies in the faction “daddys,” who were collectively referred to as Normans (regardless of whether they participated in Normandy on previous /pol/andcraft servers), proceeded to shit up the Discord and act like total faggots in general. The existence of the incredibly ugly city continued for way too fucking long, but eventually it was dabbed on by one of its own members, seklorophlegm. He was an officer in the faction and decided to unclaim all of their land, allowing each player to impose their wrath on the unbearable faggots. In late November, the fate of the “Norman” city was to be pillaged and cobblemonstered. This caused the horde of faggots to quit the server but it also rendered the server mostly inactive. Hudson removed the cobblemonster and then Scuti built a wall to block off the horrid sight which was the city ruins. Scuti got bored and joined bioman3's new faction Prussia, which sought to recreate the autism of Germania. At the same time, another player city was being built on the east side of spawn, this time without the presence of “Norman” faggots. bioman3 and Scuti abandoned their shitty walled-in house in a field in favor of a huge island. (Around this time, Scuti released the new texture pack.) This base consisted of a small cave storage area and an eternally unfinished bar. Scuti again got bored and dabbed on bioman3, opting to join JamOnToast1402's faction (named Technocracy, then dab, then SUCC (Saints Under Christ's Command)), which had an underground labyrinth base that was expansive but very unsecure. Akramer89 got pissed at JamOnToast1402 because the latter brought up the former's sexual encounters with two black men. Akramer89, fueled by rage, easily broke in and bodied him before leaving, not actually raiding the faction. Scuti was away at this time, but he subsequently defeated Akramer89 in an arena battle. Scuti did basically nothing else on this iteration afterwards. |
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| | Hudson's Server “Hudserb” – During Citadel |
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| | Near the end of January 2019, Hudson switched the server from Factions to Citadel and reset the map. The beginnings were slow. Scuti quickly advanced from shitty stone tools to standard diamond gear, initially settling in a hole he dug in the side of a hill a few hundred blocks from spawn. After Scuti asked to join Lobber, the former received coords to the latter's base, so Scuti began his long journey halfway across the map. He arrived at the mountaintop at a savanna biome, where the autist ViriatoII was naked, smelting ore, and farming. At this time, the base was a platform without a roof. At this time, there was a village populated by newfags south of spawn, continuously harassed by the retard faggot RealDonaldTrump. This village died quickly, but a plantation north of spawn was created by player ilikebacon3546, a plantation which would be less short-lived. After contributing basically nothing, Viriato disappeared, leaving only Scuti and Lobber. These two players went on to expand the base, turning it into a fortress which would become increasingly larger. They also conducted an operation in which they entered The End, killed the Ender Dragon, and proceeded to burn the Dragon Egg in order to dab on Lakiga. Sieg_Zeon joined Scuti and Lobber's party, forming what would later be called the Boomer Empire. Soon afterwards, Oveja89 (username previously “Oveja”) settled on a hill across the river from the fortress, founding the Kingdom of Ovechads. His settlement grew into a farming community populated by newfags and also Lakiga. |
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| | Except for a few border disputes between Ovechads and the Boomer Empire, times were peaceful until a random newfag gave the Empire coords to a player's base. This player was called pinkpilled and he fapped to tranny porn, as evidenced by his name. Using this as their casus belli, the Empire set off on a journey across the map to pinkpilled's island so they could gas him. pinkpilled logged off before they made it so Scuti and Sieg_Zeon broke the chests inside the house before Lobber leveled the entire fucking island. Understandably, this pissed pinkpilled off so he teamed up with his assbuddy called naam. Soon, pinkpilled and naam mounted an assault on the Empire's fortress when Scuti and Sieg_Zeon were online. The invaders' attack was almost successful, catching Scuti off guard, but he was able to regain his composure with the support of Sieg_Zeon. The Empire barely won the engagement, but the war would continue to rage on. Not much later, Sieg_Zeon found naam's base and told Scuti, who went into the base and dug to where naam was before killing him instantly. pinkpilled, becoming fuming assmad upon hearing that naam got dabbed on, started spamming alts in an attempt to DDoS the server. This attempt was a massive failure, and then pinkpilled became inactive, so only naam was left. Meanwhile, the Ovechad Kingdom was in turmoil. Oveja89 and Lakiga were treating newfags like peasants, and the newfags took it like the cucks they were. However, Lakiga managed to piss off one LARPing newfag by the name of Joseph666Stalin. This player was a huge fucking sperg and got assmad when Lakiga said shit along the lines of “fuck christcucks.” Stalin eventually ignited a civil war by killing Lakiga, which resulted in the gassing of Stalin. Oveja89 discovered that newfags had claimed chests and shit for themselves rather than for his group as a whole, so he declared war on (almost) all newfags. This was the end of the Kingdom of Ovechads and the beginning of the cleanup and purging of their former living space. |
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| | The Empire's thicc fortress |
| | The Boomer Empire's fortress continued to expand, and Lobber laid hundreds of thousands of stone bricks for the courtyard area. CptPlanet_ and thunderfunked also joined the Empire around this time. Cleaning up the mess across the river was, indeed, a fucking chore. The underage faggot naam, desperate for attention, gave out his coords. His base was a three-layered obsidian box at bedrock. Scuti teamed up with player AliceInChains (also newfag Luke_39) and began chipping away at naam's retard cube. It took fucking forever but they broke one obsidian block, but more importantly, they were joined by Sieg_Zeon, and this sped up the process. naam did not understand that people playing /pol/andcraft all have severe autism, so he was shocked as he watched his seemingly impenetrable shithole be broken into. He teleported away to spawn and came back to his base on foot, hoping to sneak attack the raiders, but Scuti saw him via X-Ray and mined his way to naam lightning fast. Once Scuti made it to naam, naam dumped out a lava bucket at Scuti's feet. naam pissed his pants when he realized that Scuti was immune to lava, then Scuti instantly killed naam. The raiders continued picking away at the obsidian box for what seemed like an eternity. Once they got through the box, combat began, and the raiders quickly dabbed on naam. They broke into chests previously thought empty and found actual treasure. Once the work was done, naam's shithole was covered in lava and an obsidian swastika was erected nearby. This was the end of the naam saga; good fucking riddance. |
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| | Oveja expresses his frustration in the heat of battle |
| | There was a time of peace following this, however, there was a new threat on the horizon. Oveja89 had been secretly duping all sorts of overpowered shit, including Chad apples (enchanted golden apples), elytra, weapons and armor. The war between Oveja and the Empire began when he flew around the roof of the fortress, where Scuti was at. Oveja lagged out and his character stayed behind for 20 seconds (CombatLog shit), so Scuti took the opportunity to Holocaust Oveja and take his shit. Later, Oveja appeared again at the fortress, this time near the Nether portal, when Scuti and Sieg_Zeon were there. Scuti ran out and engaged in combat with Oveja, but Scuti almost died from fall damage. Sieg_Zeon and Scuti chased Oveja into the desert, and Scuti eventually caught up with Oveja and dug down to the hole where the latter was, then Scuti dabbed on Oveja epicly. Oveja went to ilikebacon3546's plantation in order to arm him with duped Chad apples and gear, intending to gain an ally in the form of a newfag army. Scuti snuck up on Oveja and attacked him while he spoke to ilikebacon, almost killing Oveja. However, since Oveja realized he could use Chad apples in battle, he made use of them, so the fight lasted way too fucking long. This engagement ended when Scuti fucked off with ender pearls because his armor was about to break. Another engagement occurred where Oveja was the one who fucked off. Oveja also killed Lobber in a battle at the plantation. Soon after, Sieg_Zeon, Lobber, and Scuti went to Oveja's base and dabbed on it, also revealing to the admins that Oveja was duping shit. From then on, Oveja was no longer able to dupe shit and his supply was presumably gassed (but he still had some in his inventory). Oveja subsequently killed all of the newfags at ilikebacon3546's plantation and assumed control. Scuti and Oveja's final battle took place at the ruined plantation, and Scuti employed reinforced webs in order to troll Oveja epicly and trap him. The battle went on but neither combatant fucked off, and eventually Oveja's armor broke. Because of this, Scuti was able to easily wombo combo Oveja and free the newfags of the plantation. |
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| | The autist colc's unnecessary maze of trapdoors, viewed using X-Ray |
| | Ignoring the presence of faggots fucking with the fortress, there was a short time of peace in the Empire. This peace ended when the hunt for the faggot colccolc began. This player was a citizen of Ovechads but he was Shoah'd when it was discovered that he hoarded shit for himself. He fucked off to an underground base far to the west of the fortress. He had a spider spawner in this base and he would AFK all night long, spawning fucking thousands of spiders. The hunt began because colccolc's shit lagged the server and reduced the mob spawn rate everywhere else to zero. Eventually colccolc's base was found and broken into by Scuti, Lakiga, and Lobber. This underground base was incredibly elaborate and complex. Nobody knew just how autistic colccolc was until they witnessed this fucking monstrosity. He had hollowed out a huge cube underground and had farms and a spawner next to a large storage area which was encapsulated by three layers of obsidian. There was not just a single door to get into this area, but a fucking retarded maze of trapdoors leading to it. To get into the main storage area, one would have to open and shut over sixty fucking trapdoors. To get to the vault, one would have to go through over a fucking hundred trapdoors. In conclusion, the only option was to break through the layers of obsidian. After quickly breaking colc's spawner, Scuti, Lakiga, Sieg_Zeon, CptPlanet_, and Lobber formed a five-man team and broke into the storage area. The autist colccolc was, of course, already gone at this time, having taken his valuables. There was still some good shit because he had amassed an enormous pile of resources, but the real prize of this raid was that colccolc stopped playing and quit being a cancer on the server. |
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| | Things in the Empire were coming along relatively smoothly. The group was joined by Sgt_Chainsaw and had been continuing its expansion with a castle-y area built by Lobber, thunderfunked's construction of a bar and a church in the courtyard, and across the river was Sieg_Zeon's castle and Scuti's palace. Hudson added pearling, which served the purpose of deporting niggers by preventing them from coming within 1000 blocks of the chest the pearl is stored in. The plantation had more or less recovered from Oveja's autism, but it would soon face a much greater threat: Lakiga. The newfag gollygeekid invited his normalcuck friend ZarpaEC_ who was a faggot redditor. At one time, Zarpa had installed the texture pack and then uninstalled it because he “couldn't bear the racism.” It was clear that this faggot did not belong on /pol/andcraft, but instead belonged on r/cuckold. The spergout of Zarpa annoyed the majority of the server, but most notably Lakiga. The plantation niggers were going to sacrifice Zarpa to the gods or some shit, but Lakiga appeared at the plantation and proceeded to tear all of the newfags a new asshole, pearling each one. And so Lakiga took over the plantation, but the Empire did not like this because killing the newfags meant killing the playercount. For a while the Empire subtly worked against Lakiga but then came out and began open war against him. The Empire and Lakiga almost fought at the plantation itself (which was destroyed and thus became ugly as fuck) but instead Lakiga said to come meet him at his base, where they would show up soon after. The four-man team of Scuti, Lobber, Sieg_Zeon, and CptPlanet_ easily broke into his mountain fort and made it down to the vault, where Lakiga was lying in wait. Lakiga's master plan was to blow up the invaders, so he opened the door to his vault while lighting TNT. This backfired epicly, and Lakiga's explosion killed only himself. This ended the war, but the damage was already done; the playercount fell and the server died epicly. After about a month of a playercount of zero, the Citadel iteration of /pol/andcraft ended in May 2019. |
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